Thankfully Chewed Up and Spat Back Out!

Happy Birthday to my father in Heaven who showed me what true nurturing love is from a heart with pure intentions.. Happy Mother's Day to my mother who lived with so much pain in her being, of which she never really shared. She never felt worthy of love and pushed away any signs of emotions- a trait I am seeing passed down from many generations prior in her family, well documented and holy cow history. I am sorry she never learned for herself to love herself, like so many before her and so many women today still struggle with on a day where they are showered with it - I've been there myself but plan on never returning down those dark roads, and you can too. Ladies- take in the love today - enjoy every moment. To those with an ache in their heart on this day for whatever reason - don't hide away, don't deny your pain - find a way to use this day for self expression, self love - Mother and Nurture your own being with care.... And to all...share a smile with every child yo

  Many of us grew up being trained to protect Evil - it's that "never tell anyone!" vocal and even if it is silent, threat. It silenced our voices, stunted our emotional growth and chained our souls to an invisible prison. Masks hiding our truths while we empowered dysfunction's gears to keep churning.   If you wonder why and how so many people can be brainwashed to follow the epitome of evil, Greed and it's evil call....think back to how your friends or even you were trained as a child during your days of growing up not being seen while you remained silent protecting abuse and the abusers -   Stop that.   Back in the day of reporting and community volunteering advocacy, I used to get agency people whispering in my ear so they could protect their jobs, knowing I would do something about the injustice being exposed to me.   I allowed these people to use me as the battering ram - knowingly.I knew they were protecting their jobs/income/image, and even if I would h

https://pixabay.com/users/dengri-3457401/ You will never hear me say "Just let go."  The reason? Because I know how detrimental that is to say to someone whose heart is breaking or has broken already into those tiny shattered pieces giving light to their despair. It's insulting to their experience, it's dismisses their pain, their trauma suffered and if it was that easy to just 'let go' they already would have released it all.  Hearts pump blood through our bodies, keeping our souls grounded to our existence - we are born to love one another - to recognize the hearts in others - letting go is not as easy as meme on the internet nor just closing off the memories stored in that heart, even in those tiny shattered pieces that represent trauma and dysfunction...actually probably more so for those of us who've known that pain.  I'd rather tell people to own their experiences, feel all those emotions they denied when they tried to let go to something their h

We have a monster ravishing urban centers, sinking suburbia, and strangling our rural treasured small communities who help to place food on all of our tables by their hard work in communities just as poor as those urban concrete oppressive centers. His name is Greed and his handlers call Wall Street home. Our politicians are too damn busy choking on circus peanuts he throws at their asses to keep them occupied and ready to do his bidding. Gaudy gold is their calling and while slavery may no longer be legal in this country, the wealthy have figured their way around it by keeping us ALL drones while they hold the carrot of hope always just out of reach. The real power in this country sits on Wall Street among all those ladies in waiting investors, ready and willing to bed with Greed's evil crusty self from just a wink and the lie capitalism will set you free. Those courtesans to greed are the sickeningly rich, convincing themselves what is beneficial to them is to us, but the problem

  Energy. Lately I’ve been more aware of the energy around me, in my environment and what those around me emanate. This is not a surprising thing to say for a survivor of childhood trauma, domestic violence and sexual assault. It is known as hyper-viliegence. Factor in being what some people call an Empath, I understand emotions behind actions and why they are sparked. I was born a student. Life made me a silent observer and then showed me I could be a voice, better yet -I could show others how to use their voice. I’ve seen it from the eyes of a survivor, a mother, a reporter, a volunteer, someone in need fleeing abuse, and then now as some nearing my end years navigating a system set up to tear away at any dignity I’ve managed to save. This forced retirement from life outside the walls of my home, where I once thrived, has taught me a few things; 1) Time will catch up with you. 2) We are the walking wounded navigating life on a planet we keep ignoring, because, ya know, we know it all