Triangulation - be weary of the false victim
Those who create the behind the scenes drama are usually knee deep in jealousy and considered toxic. Recently I ran across a posting that sums up their triangulation tactics to a "T."
In the posting they speak about splitting - "This method of triangulation involves pitting two people against each other. The narcissist does this by smearing the character of one or both of the people behind their backs. This enables the narcissist to preserve their false image and ensures they’re viewed positively among the triangle. In many instances, the narcissist will portray themselves as the victim, especially if they feel their partner is growing tired or aware of their manipulation, , and abuse."
Creating and spreading the rumors keeps the toxic person at the top of the triangle, at least in their mind. They view themselves as the go to person, their need for adulation dictates all they do - if anything or anyone threatens their self-perceived notion of importance, they will lash out while screaming they are victimized. Pity feeds their ego. The weak fall victim to the cycle.
Pay attention to their history - Do they job hop? Have they moved a lot? Do they name drop? Do they have a lot of social media friends but those numbers are not reflected in likes to their posts? The red flags are there, pay attention. They will keep the targets of their envy close so that they can keep tabs on them. Basically, they stalk. Cut them loose whenever and however you can.
You cannot fix them. You cannot help them. You will only feed their demons if you play their game.
You will see just how they stalk when you do cut loose a toxic person. If you unfriend them on social media it will be noticed. Now, why does someone with so many supposed friends notice the one number drop on their friends' list? Because they place so much value on the numbers, not the quality. They need to be perceived as important and popular. Who else pays attention to such things other than someone with twisted thinking?
A while back I blocked such a person from my Facebook page. At first, they didn't notice but within a couple of weeks I was getting screen shots from others on how they cut loose on me with postings and memes about me blocking them. How did they find out they were blocked? They were unable to stalk my profile. The weak fed their pity and self-victimization.
Do not fall for triangulation.
In the following video she speaks about triangulation in an intimate relationship but it can occur in any type of relationship.