Can't Ignore it Any Longer...R.I.P. Francesca

This week as I was focusing on my lawn and the dire need for a lawnmower, I was also doing something else; avoiding the news reports here in Wisconsin on the recent domestic violence murder suicides that have taken place.

I needed to take that mental break, especially after receiving Tim's letter from prison reminding me that he is still out there, and still thinking of me...trying to "invoke a response"...his own words. But the break is over and this story needs to be told...................


On Tuesday (05/19/09) Steve Weber's, 49, of Verona Wisconsin, body was found after an intense manhunt lead by the SWAT team. The body was found in Madison's Hoyt Park at approximately 7:00 p.m.

Weber was a victim of suicide, and had been the target of the manhunt as he was suspected of shooting and killing his ex-wife the Saturday before at her Fitchburg apartment. The couple's divorce had been just finalized the week prior to Francesca's murder.

That's how this tragic story ended ...........but there's so MUCH MORE to it...............Weber the week prior to this murder reportedly sat in a bar and told a bartender how he was going to go on a shooting rampage and kill Francesca. This was reported in the news after the murder, and was mentioned as one of the reasons for search warrants that were issued after the shooting.

On 01/05/09 charges against Weber were filed by the Dane County District Attorney's office....those charges included 4 felony counts and 2 misdemeanors.

1) 940.235(1) Strangulation and Suffocation Felony H
2) 940.235(1) Strangulation and Suffocation Felony H
3) 948.03(2)(b) Child Abuse-Intentionally Cause Harm Felony H
4) 947.01 Disorderly Conduct Misd. B
5) 946.41(1) Resisting or Obstructing an Officer Misd. A
6) 941.21 Disarming a Peace Officer Felony H

Now excuse my language...but some pretty scary and serious shit, huh? I read that and pull from my own experience living in a domestic violent situation, and can just imagine the night of terror those charges must have led to for some victim; Francesca.

As a survivor myself I can be almost certain there were more incidents like that and know they do not reflect the living hell that existed within the mind and heart of the victim. One would imagine that Weber's bail must have been set high for such charges, right?

Strangulation...suffocation??? That's attempted MURDER in my book!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That's no accident...that's intent to KILL! Good thing I am not judge, huh? Because there is no way in hell this man would have been able to walk out of my court room with the following bail:

02-10-2009 Cash bond conditions modified
Event Party Amount Weber, Steven J $ 500.00
Additional Text: Counts 1, 2, 3, 5 and 6 - $100 cash per count.
Cash bail of $500 posted on 1/6/09.Count 4 - Signature Bond-
Defendant shall not have any contact, direct or indirect, with Stephanie W.-
Defendant shall not have any contact, except by telephone, direct or indirect, with Franchesca W.- Defendant shall not be on Anton Dr.-
Defendant shall not consume alcohol.

Especially since there had been prior incidents of domestic violence concerning this

a 2006 injunction and temp. restraining order - based on domestic violence claims

a 2004 disorderly conduct (aka no bruises) where the defendant wasn't allowed contact with his wife for 72 hours.

In 2000 (3) counts of bail jumping

Oh and then in 2000 let's not forget this case.........
1 947.01 Disorderly Conduct Misd. B Dismissed on Prosecutor's Motion 2 940.19
(1) Battery Misd. A Guilty / No Contest 3 940.19
(1) Battery Misd. A Dismissed on Prosecutor's Motion 4 940.44
(1) Intimidate Victim/Dissuade Reporting Misd. A Guilty / No Contest

Which came only 2 years after another Disorderly Conduct conviction in 1998

And poor Weber was convicted of being in possession of cocaine in 1997

In 1997 he was also charged and convicted of being an ESCAPED FELON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There are more charges and convictions in this murderer's history, but to tell you the truth the more I see and read the more my stomach churns, and tears stream BECAUSE THIS SHOULD HAVE NEVER HAVE HAPPENED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A $500 bail with a little warning to a convicted and known felon was the invitation to a madman to kill the focus of his twisted anger and obsession...

SHAME ON YOU THE STATE OF WISCONSIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LEARN FROM THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!


Don't just charge, fine and release these twisted minds back out into the community!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You stick them into the county jails for a few months here and there...create dry drunks and addicts that sit there and learn how to manipulate the system....treatment programs are often just a few "anger management" classes (which in my ex's case were consistently CANCELLED!) tell them to go to AODA...which again is a JOKE!!!!! My ex, Tim, well he would go to his AODA counselor...sit there are watch the videos...look at the little handouts....say he was sorry...and then leave only to get drunk and stalk me!!!

Probation officers rarely check in with family ...ask them what is happening and going on...the many, and I mean many, that Tim had in the few years he was on probation...NOT ONCE did a probation officer contact me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I contacted them a few times begging them to help get him treatment ....housing...something so he would leave me alone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And don't sit there and victim blame asking why these victims stay especially when there is no accountability REAL consequences placed upon the abusers. No real rehabilitation program in real mental health treatment given to offenders....

Yes, Wisconsin, not only is the current system flawed and filled with holes and raping tax payers ....but it is costing LIVES!!!!!!!!!!!

Rest in Peace Francesca...............may your life and death not have been in vain.

For more on this story, and background read here -

Below is a real example into the mind of an abuser and how he sees the system...

This clip comes at the end of a nightmare for me that happened on Aug. 13, 2007 ...the day my then estranged husband, now ex husband, held me captive for over an hour and assaulted me sexually, mentally and physically with my sons present to witness. I had audio recorded the entire event on my laptop...the 1 hours and 14 minutes, not knowing what was going to take place....but knew when he walked into my room that day something was about to happen to change my life...I thought it would be my last day on Earth and wanted people to know what really happened....

So here is that glimpse into a mind of an abuser....and why today I even still have nightmares even though I know I am a survivor...(warning if you are sensitive or have PTSD please do not listen)


Gin said…
You are a strong, strong woman! Even though there may be days when you may not feel that way...YOU ARE! I admire your honesty and your sincere desire to help others. Bless you!
Colleen said…
I do not get it. How many people have to die before the legal system wakes up?!?!? You would think we live in the dark ages.
I am sorry for your pain and for what your ex husband did to you.
Maggie, Dammit said…
I know this has got to feel like you're being re-victimized every single time and I am so sorry for that. So sorry.

The media needs to call it like it is. They need to use the words "domestic violence" and they need to include the hotline number in every single article. They don't. They should. It would be a start.
Eva Marie said…
Sometimes I do feel like that, and other times I do not -

As for the media, well they often wait to report on Domestic Violence incidents until it is a newsworthy murder. Sad, but true.

This problem needs to be addressed before it gets that far...

The court system....
Treatment programs for offenders and also their victims....
Supports in place for women that do not in all essence re-victimize them...

Think about it..many victims stay because of fear...including financial fears...these abusers once arrested, and convicted sit in jails and prisons guests of the State and are not paying child support of any kind.

Now that victim needs to rely on shelters, and services for help...or family if they are not estranged by this point because "She'll just go back" ..

Accountability needs to readdressed, reevaulated...and work in the real world!

Sorry...I could go on and on about this subject.........

Thanks everyone for your comments so far.......

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